I have never met Jonas, but did come second to him in a message board contest a few years back. That's not kissing either, is it?

No it's not really Jame. Next you'll be claiming you rubbed up against Clodagh Rogers in a duffle coat - that won't count either.

Tim, your knowledge of my past doings verges on the near-stalkerish. I'm quite scared.

Well young Jame. Needless to say we will keep the story of you, Olivia Newton John, the ironing board and the roller skates to ourselves. It's strictly a need to know basis....