Usually I'll have a crop of misheard lyrics to help me titter and fnar my way through the entries (madam). Only one this year... I swear I heard "a tiger cr aps inside a cage..." the first time I heard Valentine Lost. Anyone spotted any more?

Won't know for another eight days (adopts *smug* face), but I will always treasure the moment when Petra Frey sand "climb on my c***' not far into the first verse of Fur Den Frieden Der Welt.

So, Iain, how was the iceberg lettuce?

I think we should put Jame in a listening booth lock him up so he can listen to all the entries

I'm ashamed to say that my forfeit is still to be undertaken...but I'm sure Mrs K is lurking with her rolling pin to make sure it happens

I shall never forgive Jame for telling me about Anus in the Air....as for the Darja Svajger NFinalist 'A Wonder Every Day' which talks about 'the ******* comes' and the English version of Mabel's Boom Boom which clearly appears to have the classic line 'I won't give up my skateboard , ever....'

The B-A-S-TARD comes

God, how I hate censorship.

Well if we're into misheard ESC lyrics, if you listen to Lena Ph's Swedish version of 'It Hurts' (not really recommended), it does sound very much like at one point she sings about "Fatty girl Ulrika"...hmmm. Some dull Swede did tell me what it really was...have these people no sense of irony?